The "Sign"

Sometimes it is just so hard to keep up when you feel you saw it. You feel you saw that sign from that one person, when actually that one person is going in the opposite direction. You smile the whole day just to end up crying again. In the end, you go to sleep just the way you wake up: tired and groggy. The much anticipated moment is never as magical as you dream it to be, because change attacks it like a hawk attacking a mouse. Change occurs to everything. You try to change something for the better, and you get eaten by a hawk. That is  what happens almost every time you get the "sign."

Frozen

I am frozen in time.
The hands are moving,
every minute, every second.
Everything rushing by.

Everyone around me
seems to be able to move
along with time
like an old friend.

Me,
I've been stuck in that moment,
and the moment is slowly
sucking me in...

Now,
somewhere in time,
I am fading
slowly.

Still...

Sunlight.
The heat burning.
The warmth everywhere.
Still cold inside.

Peace.
Happiness flowing.
Laughter running free.
Still miserable within.

Adventure.
Excitement in the air.
Discovery all around.
Still asleep inside.

Time.
Moving rapidly.
Closer and closer.
Still frozen within.

Maddening

Why can't I figure it out?

This feeling

that contains

a million other feelings?

All I know is

that it is clouding my 

already clouded mind.

It is maddening.

Claustrophobia

is what I experience

when I try to understand

what the hell is going on.

I am so fucking blank

and at the same time

I have no idea about what is going on.

It is maddening.

Set Myself Free

I don't get it.
The change is uncomprehendible.
Yin and Yan
all in one.

Be more clear
with those hidden intentions,
because, not you,
but it is me confused.

In this hurried place
I stare above and wonder:
if you believe in your beliefs,
then why ruin me?

Sometimes,
just the moment
causes me to
set myself free.

No Space

Imagine yourself in a dark room.
The sunlight blocked out,
the wind pushed out,
no other form of life anywhere.

Small room,
growing smaller and smaller;
so small until
all it contains is you.

You can't think.
No space to think.
No space to feel.
No space.

You want to cry,
you want to smile;
but you can't
in a room with no space.